So the Holidays Arrived and Your Heart Isn’t Ready? There’s a strange kind of pressure that shows up every December. Lights switch on, calendars fill, and suddenly the whole world seems to be performing joy on command. Meanwhile, some of us stand there wondering why the season feels… heavier than it used to. Quieter. A little out of sync.

If you’ve caught yourself thinking:

• “Why am I not excited to see my family?”

• “Shouldn’t I feel relieved to have time off?”

• “Why does everyone online look ecstatic while I feel caught off guard?”

• “Why do I pretend I don’t care, or that ‘festive’ just isn’t my thing?”

- then something important is happening inside you.

Burnout doesn’t always arrive with flames. Sometimes it slips in gently, in the very moments we’re supposed to be at our brightest.

And here’s the thing: burnout rarely has a single root. It’s not just work or deadlines or Slack messages at 10 PM. Sometimes the deeper exhaustion grows quietly — from old family dynamics, emotional labour, the pressure to be “easy,” the habit of carrying more than your share, or the soft fear of disappointing anyone.

Burnout is often a story of many threads and December has a way of tugging all of them.

Have You Noticed These Subtle Signs?

Small things may feel heavier: The cheerful music in shops scrapes against your nerves. Your energy evaporates faster around certain people. You move through gatherings like you’re underwater. You’re tired - but when you finally stop, you feel restless and cant find comfort. You crave connection - but the idea of talking feels like work. Your emotions feel distant, like they’re taking a different route to reach you.

To be clear - you may still be functioning, still smiling, still organising, still performing “I’m okay”…
but something in you is signalling that you’re operating on reserve.

High-functioning burnout is a master at self-rationalising:

• “It’s just the holiday rush.”

• “Everyone’s stressed this time of year.”

• “Things will calm down soon.”

• “This is normal for December.”

These explanations feel true, but they also keep you from noticing the real signals your body has been whispering for months.

Maybe It’s Not “Just December.” Maybe It’s Early Burnout.

Not the dramatic kind. The quiet kind which hides behind competence. It shows up in the mismatch between who you are on the outside and how you feel on the inside.
It shows up when the world tells you it’s time to celebrate, and your nervous system resists and says, “I don’t think I can.”

So this year, instead of pushing through, consider doing the opposite: pay attention - increase awareness.

How to Move Softer Through the Festive Season

1. Learn What Drains and What Restores You

Keep a tiny list in your notes app, on scrap paper, or at the minimum pause and notice:

Drainers:
What takes from you without giving anything back?

Chargers:
What brings even a small exhale into your body?

This isn’t productivity. This is self-discovery and your nervous system is showing you how to care for it.

2. Listen to Your Body Speak - It Knows First

Your body reacts before your logic does, and it will tell you what feels safe and what doesn’t - long before your early burnout leads to a critical situation that could have been avoided.

Notice what happens:

• In shops: Do you tense, shrink, rush, shut down or snap?

• Running errands and organising: Does your breath get shallow? Shoulders tighten? You feel knot in your stomach?

• With family: Do you over-perform hoping for a different reaction? Do you numb out? Do you slip into the background and disappear behind any excuse you can find?

And after noticing, gently ask:

“What exactly triggered this feeling?”
“What would need to be different for this not to happen?”

The purpose is not to judge but to understand and adjust in the feature.

3. Feeling Contradictory Emotions? You’re Not Broken

The curious thing about the burnout is that it loves paradoxes:

• You may be wanting to be alone but feeling lonely at the same time.

• You were loving the idea of being off work but feeling restless and don't know what to do with yourself

• You are surrounded by people but feeling disconnected and lonely

• Your feel exhausted but settling down triggers racing thoughts and guilt

When this happens, find a simple grounding moment:

• Feel your feet on the floor or notice the touch points where your body meets the chair

• Name 5 things you see, 4 you can touch, 3 you hear, 2 you smell, 1 you taste

• Take a deep inhale through your nose and a longer exhale through your mouth for 3–5 breaths and observe how your body slowly softens.

• Place a hand over your heart and feel the warmth, or run warm or cold water over your hands and focus on the sensation.

Anchoring in in presence is your medicine.

4. Notice Your Quick-Dopamine Moves

…we all have them:

• Sugar after dinner

• Wine to blur the edges

• Online carts filling mysteriously

• Scrolling until midnight

• Cleaning the entire house for no reason

• Planning your whole life in 30 minutes

• Starting new projects just to feel something

These aren’t failures - they’re the ways your system tries to step out when things feel too much.

Instead of judging yourself, pause and ask:

“What feeling was I trying to avoid?”
“What pressure was building?”
“What would actually soothe me?”

That question alone can help you break a cycle.

A Softer Approach to the New Year

1. Reflect Through Energy, Not Achievement

Instead of the usual year-end audit, try a more honest one:

• What drained me consistently?

• What replenished me, even briefly?

• Where did I feel like myself?

• Where did I shrink or overextend?

Your body will remember even when your mind wants to forget.
*Tip: Your photo gallery is a great cue — it can bring back the moments your body registered even if your mind didn’t.

2. Identify the Moments When You Felt Emptiest

Often these moments are where quick dopamine took over.
Journal, just briefly:

• What deeper need went unmet?

• Where did I override myself?

• What part of me was asking for care?

This is where self-understanding begins. Only then you can follow these question with the most important one:

• What did I really need?

Once you have that understanding you can think of way how to address them in the New Year in a sustainable ways.

3. Don’t Rewrite Your Whole Life in One Night — Create Micro-Routines Instead

Burnout thrives in extremes. It loves “new year, new me” as much as it loves “I don't care about resolutions.”

Choose the slower middle path and let your choices be aligned with your values, not with the expectations of family, colleagues, algorithms, or culture. Use what you learned about your high and low moments from the previous year and don't forget to reflect on your Drainers and Energisers. That will give you a good ground to define truly yours ideas for micro-routines that matter, for example:

• A slow 10-minute morning ritual

• One sacred screen-free evening a week

• A Sunday reset in your own style - quiet, reflective, or playful

• A regular evening in sauna

• A daily check-in: “What do I need right now?”

• A weekly Drainers vs Chargers review

• Three-minute grounding after overwhelming interactions

• A boundary you protect without apology

• A monthly “dopamine audit”

These don’t demand reinvention as they support who you already are - and who you’re becoming.

A Final Thought

If this season feels different: flatter, heavier, strangely distant chances are there is nothing wrong with you and most importantly you are not alone in it.

Sometimes burnout slips in quietly, at the very moment life asks you to sparkle.

And maybe this year isn’t about pushing yourself into joy but about listening to the quiet parts of you that are asking for space, softness, and a pace that actually fits. About putting yourself first.

Your nervous system is wiser than you expect -let it guide you into the new year.